Monday, 15 July 2013

Letter to Mum and Dad

Dear Mum and Dad,

I write to you because I'm informed by my wife and other members of my church that I appear to have developed a talent for writing especially when it comes to matters spiritual. This comes as a quiet revelation to me since I am still motivated by the luke warm reception of my literacy skills as a child.  I think my talent has been revealed to me because of the relationship I now enjoy with God. I am taught by the Bible and therefore by Jesus Himself to honour my parents, so it is in that vein that I write to you now.

While I may have in the past concentrated on transgressions I am now motivated by the need to show love. In an effort of your edification I need to express my deep felt appreciation for the love and support and protection you have given me for my entire life and still give me today. Not just through finances, but through all the sacrifices you made for me. Your determination to teach me and raise me and care for me is evident by the the successful end result, by the man I am today. From a very early age you taught me vital skills that help me flourish today. How to read and write, to swim, to play and appreciate music, to operate and understand computers, to ride a bike, and you even helped me later learn how to drive a car. Together through your different talents you gave me  an appreciation of both the spiritual and the scientific worlds in which we live.

When you saw that I was being corrupted by government schooling you put your efforts into educating me privately at a huge financial cost. Through those vital years my schooling was a crippling burden on you both and it must have been so difficult for you to go through such a sacrifice for me. Despite this huge burden you still persisted in funding my education for me. I am so grateful for that because it has been so beneficial to me, and while the schools themselves would wish to take sole credit for it, it was your effort and your hard work that got me there and why I was able to remain there. While the school would have failed in its duty if it had lapsed in it's efforts to educate me, there seems to be no automatic duty for parents to aim to give their child such a privileged upbringing. This is evident in the way I see children being brought up today. It is so shocking, but all too common, to see neglectful parents that are barely motivated to keep their child alive, let alone care about their education or life skills.

Without wishing to give overdue credit to Freudian psychology, a significant part of the basis of my behaviour in my marriage follows the example of the relationship that you have demonstrated to me. One thing that seems prominent more recently, and this was pointed out by your friend Sally, is your overwhelming determination through adversity. Specifically being strong willed to fight through debilitating illness.

I notice the encroach of time and can see the moments that we have left in this world together are finite. It feels not that long ago that I saw life as something that was virtually endless, but as I know now, time goes by quickly and I am rapidly approaching middle age.  Therefore I realise how important that these things need to be said.

Me and Fran both yearn for the ability to one day be given the opportunity to be in the position you are in now so that our future child may be able to write a letter like this to us, safe in the knowledge that we have been successful as parents. It is by God's grace that we would be given that opportunity and strength that Christ gives us on the cross that gives thus the hope that one day we too would know the joy, love, pleasure and effort of parenthood.

I will always remain eternally grateful for all that you have done for me.

All my love,

Ben

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